"The attorney quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided that he could easily take the old codger. He agreed to abide by the local custom.The old farmer slowly climbed down from the tractor and walked up to the attorney. His first kick planted the toe of his heavy steel toed work boot into the lawyer's groin and dropped him to his knees! His second kick to the midriff sent the lawyer's last meal gushing from his mouth. The lawyer was on all fours when the farmer's third kick to his rear end, sent him face-first into a fresh cow pie.The lawyer summoned every bit of his will and remaining strength and very slowly managed to get to his feet. Wiping his face with the arm of his jacket, he said, "Okay, you old fart. Now it's my turn."(I love this part) The old farmer smiled and said, "Nah, I give up. You can have the duck."This one is compliments of kilocyclesExcuse meA man enters a hotel lobby. As he runs to the front desk, he accidentally bumps into a woman and as he does,. She was about to give me another pieceof her mind when she stopped - and sniffed my breath. I guess thechampagne didn't completely mask the odor. She rolled her eyeballs andshook her head with resignation."Now I know you have a death wish," she moaned, then looked up at mewith a rueful smile on her lips. "Time for some more mouthwash-thingies. What am I gonna do with you?" Anything you wish, Lover," I whispered in her ear, "but we shouldprobably wait until later - after this little shindig is over. You knowhow people like to talk. By the way, let's not forget who started medown the road of living dangerously."Susan did see me later that evening. I caught her out of the corner ofmy eye, glaring at me from across the room. When a member of the groupI was in shifted to one side and Susan saw I was on Rob's arm, Ithought her eyes were going to pop out of her skull. She resumedconversation with various members of her group, glancing in mydirection. A couple of the men smiled and said.
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